Where R U Going my Little One, Little One

I love this photograph of Little Zo Peep that was taken 1 week before she started Kindergarten this September.

I like looking at this photo because I think it reveals a window into Zo Peep’s adult self. Look at her stance, her eyes, her hands, her expression, her sense of self. Doesn’t she look much older than a 5 year old???

Occasionally, I look at my firtborn and see beyond the young child sitting or standing before me. I see her life in the future -- Hopefully one filled with love and adventure and happiness and purpose and security.

Some days I regret how quickly she seems to be growing up. For example, she desperately wants to start losing her baby teeth to be more like her classmates. In fact, she makes me check for wobbly teeth every night and every morning. Fortunately (from my viewpoint) all of her teeth are nice and secure right now.

But that will change. It is supposed to change. After all, my job is to raise her (and Libby Doodle Doo) to be adults someday – not to remain my babies.

I just wish that it all didn’t happen sooooo quickly.

Getting to Know Little Zo Peep

My first born is an amazing child. The first time I saw her referral picture I was struck by how her eyes were full of wonderment as she absorbed all that was going on around her.

I was so excited to become a mother. But when I first met her she reacted totally differently than the other 7 babies in our travel group. The other girls were either complacent or happily engaged with their new situation and their new parents. Not Z. She was p***ed. She screamed bloody murder for 2 days straight. She refused to eat or drink ANYthing (I remember who frightened I was and how I thought that she was going to die). She neither wet or soiled a diaper for those 2 days.

And then at the end of the 2nd day I casually noticed how dry her legs were. I took some lotion out of my travel bag and slowly started to rub it into her feet and ankles. Immediately she started to watch me (still screaming mind you). As I continued to massage her legs with moisturizer she stopped crying and began staring at me -- evauating this horrible person who had ripped her from a life and people that she knew and loved. And at that moment she decided to accept me. And at that moment I became her mother. For the rest of the trip, Z became a velcro baby. No one could hold her except me. When my pediatrician first met us back home a few weeks later she was amazed at how bonded Z had become in such a short period of time.

Fast forward 4+ years. The child still has a insatiable curiousity about everyone and everything around her. She still displays that inherent stubborness and temper that she demonstrated in those first days. But she can also be kind and funny and silly and sweet.

And I know this next statement is horribly biased because I love this child so much -- but Z has a unique spirit about her. Kids -- both older and younger gravitate to her. Adults -- even those who really don't like kids -- adore her. And although I'm not really into any of that "new age" stuff, Z has always felt like an old soul to me She can display this Zen-like calm that make her feel much older than her 5.25 years.

So please meet Zo Peep. She will always be my first born -- the child that made me reach a lifelong dream to be a mother.