The Gentle Arms of China

This has been my "Moby Dick" video -- the one that kept getting away. I first edited this video last July, but while I was putting it together, my computer seized up and I lost it. I tried again last Christmas, but had an Apple employee delete it as he was performing routine maintenance. I decided to give it one more try this week.

The backstory on the video is that I wanted to create a piece that celebrated the amazing, ancient culture to which my girls were born. I've set the footage to a bluegrass tune -- Gentle Arms of Eden.

I hope you enjoy.

Whatever Happened to.......?

When I read blogs, I sometimes wonder how some things that the blogger wrote about ultimately turned out.

So here are some quick update of subjects I’ve discussed in previous posts to keep everyone informed of what’s happened since I first wrote about them:

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Videos from my China Trip.

When I first got back from China, I discovered that my brand new IMovie Mac software program would not import my hours and hours of High Definition video that I had taken with my brand new video camera during my trip. Net, net I can’t edit any of the video that I shot.

After a couple attempts to work around this issue and after talking to some people who are much more tech savvy than me, it looks like I have to go and get another editing software program. Some friends of my babysitter are figuring out the best one for me to use (not so sophisticated that I won’t be able to self-teach myself how to use it, but not so unsophisticated that I’ll have the same problems I have with IMovie).

This setback has been a real bummer. I spent a lot of money on the software program in December and LOTS of money on the High Definition video camera in January – I’m still amazed that these two items aren’t compatible – shouldn’t a brand new Apple editing software program be designed to work with High Definition???

Are you reading this, Stephen Jobs?

The Beach Bead Chain

In an attempt to get my chickadees out of the door by 7:15AM each morning, I instituted a Beach Bead incentive on Feb 25.

Every morning that we make it out of the door on time and without any hassles (whining, pouting, arguments about what to wear, etc), Zo Peep gets a bead that she adds to a string. When she accumulates 100 beads, I’ll take her (and Libby Doodle Doo and myself) on an incremental vacation to a beach.

We’ve been doing this for 14 days. So far, Zo Peep has earned 8 beads. Even on the 6 days in which she hasn’t earned a bead, we’ve gotten out of the house much earlier than we were before and with much less contention. So I think it’s been a great success.

I’ve counted out the 100 beads with her when we started and put them in a glass jar in the kitchen. When she earns it, Zo Peep really takes pleasure in picking her bead out of the jar and stringing it on her string. We have the string hanging on the back door of the kitchen.

When my sister came to visit us for Libby Doodle Doo’s birthday on March 2nd, Zo Peep told her about the Beach Bead Chain.

“And when I get 100 beads, mommy is going to take us to Hawaii.”

WHAT!!! Who said anything about Hawaii? I’m trying to manage Miss Peep’s expectation of exactly where this beach will be.


My Obsession with Teeth

For someone who is not in the dental profession, I write a lot about teeth – losing teeth, cutting teeth, brushing teeth etc.

Zo Peep still is waiting for her second tooth to fall out. I think we have about two or three more weeks to go before we face another traumatic night with the tooth fairy.

Maybe I can time the loss of her tooth to Easter and our annual visit from the Easter Bunny. That way I may ask Mr. Bunny to pick up the tooth and deliver it to the Tooth Fairy – so that the Peep doesn’t have to freak out again that Ms. Fairy is reaching under her pillow as she sleeps.

Libby Doodle Doo is still in cranky teething mode. Even daycare personnel - who usually talk about how pleasant she is - have been commenting on the Doodle’s very cranky behavior. Gee I hope these two lower teeth erupt soon—we could use the peace at home.

Miss Peep has fully embraced the need to brush and floss since learning about it twice in school last month. We are using individual flossers and she is doing it every morning and evening like clockwork. I still haven’t purchased a fluoride rinse for her yet. I always think about it at home, but never put it on a grocery list.

Friday Fish Fry

We’ve gone back once to the local church’s Lenten Fish Fry. The second time was even more pleasant than the first. My sister met us there and we had a really nice time. We were put at a table with a really nice lady and her daughter (age about 8 I’m guessing). They were a very nice family and we enjoyed getting to know them.

Libby Doodle Doo was in rare form that night and entertained the crowd a lot. One volunteer came over to talk to me about her and about adopting from China. She told me that she always dreamed of adopting from China, but with 7 children (yes, you read that correctly – 7 children) she was never able to save enough money to do it. God bless her – 7 children.

And I think 2 are overwhelming at times.

The Hen House on TV

Late last year I wrote a posting on how the HGTV show, “What you get for the Money” came in 07 and filmed the Hen House – plus the Peep and me – for a future segment of their show (I think it’s going to be the show about what you get for VERY LITTLE money – since it seems most of the homes featured on that show cost in excess of $500 thousand).

The production company wrote to me and told me that they aren’t going to air the shows in my series (My episode is 702) until 2009!!! I’m trying to convince them to send me the video (ideally the raw video, too) before then. They shot for 9.5 hours and took lots of video of the Peep who was very, very hammy that day. I’d love to see that.

Hey maybe I can edit it with the new software I’m getting!

Chick Flicks -- The Homecoming

Here's the first of many (I hope) videos from my trip. My brand new video camera created high definition video, but my iMovie program on my Mac won't import it. I have to resolve that issue asap. So the only video I could create this weekend was the moment that Little Zo Peep met her sister for the very first time and was reunited with me after 14 days.

I mentioned before that my babysitter was having problems with my old video camera that I left behind. I used her video (plus some snippets taken on my digital still camera) to cobble together this piece. The quality isn't great, but the sentiment is there.

I hope you enjoy

Back in the USA

Signing in from Newark. The trip was long, tiring, but not as bad as I anticipated. Libby Doodle Doo didn't sleep very much -- probably only 2 of the 16 hours, but she was very well behaved when awake and hardly ever got fussy. In general all of the 16 Jiangxi beauties did great on the flight.

We have a layover here and then home. I'll write more about the flight and my homecoming with Little Zo Peep late tonight (I'm suspecting that I'll be awake due to jet lag).

Ciao for now.

Homeward Bound

Hello from Hong Kong. It's Thursday morning a little before 8am. We arrived here via bus at 8pm last night, checked-in, ordered room service, ate and crashed.

I can't wait to get home.

We left the White Swan at 2:30 and boarded a big bus. We drove to the other side of Guangzhou (they have moved the consulate since I was here last time) and had our consulate appointment. When that was done we re- boarded a bus and drove to Hong Kong.

We had to go through 2 border checkpoints. One as we left China (where we had to take all of our luggage off the bus and go through immigration review). And then again when we crossed a bridge and entered Hong Kong. In total from hotel to Hong Kong (with a consulate appt thrown in for good measure) the trip took 5+ hours. The families all held up well, but we did have outbursts here and there. I think I got a preview of what our day will be like today on our long, long flight. We have a long layover in Newark and then will get home around 8PM.

So by the time I get home I will be using Planes, buses and automobiles.

Have to sign off and check out of my hotel. See everyone on the other side.

Update: We're at the gate now. Will take off in about 2 hours. Can't wait. Libby Doodle Doo is getting a taste of her first blueberry muffin. She's in heaven right now.

Lights, Camera, Chaos

The Red Couch picture is a tradition in Chinese adoption for adoptive parents staying at the White Swan. The goal is to line up all the babies on the White Swan's red couch and let the parents snap a few pictures.

Now in reality there are many red couches on the 2nd floor lobby of the White Swan. When we were lining up our darlings on one red couch, another travel group was doing the same about 100 yards from us. Second, the White Swan red sofa can hold -- at best -- 8 babies (and that's packed like sardines). Our group had 16. So parents of some of the girls propped them up like hand puppets on the back and sides of the sofa. Finally, anyone knows taking a picture of 2 children is tough. It's a lucky shot that has both children looking at the camera and smiling. OK, now multiply that by a factor of 8 -- you try getting 16 babies to look into the lens and smile.

Here's the photo (Libby Doodle Doo is in the front row, 2nd from right in blue with -- you guessed it -- sucking her thumb):

Like her big sister Little Zo Peep 4 years ago, my Libby Doodle Doo holds the distinction of being the first of the babies to break rank and start crying. Once she turned on the waterworks, the photo op was over. One by one other babies began to melt down.

We arrived at the Red Couch location before any of the other parents. While waiting, we got an opportunity to take some solo shots of the Doodle queen:

Good times, good memories. Tomorrow is our consulate appointment (our LAST step) and then we're off to Hong Kong and then home on Thursday.

Say AHHHHHHHHH....

Today was our visit to the hospital for the health exam Libby Doodle Doo needed to complete her US Consulate paperwork. Our little army of mommies, daddies, relatives, and babes in strollers left at 9 this morning. There was a little nip in the air -- just perfect strolling weather. We walked from the hotel to the hospital and back again – about 10 minutes each way. We passed a park where people were doing exercises to music, lovely gnarled trees with Spanish moss hanging from them, stately consulates with gates, people playing badminton in the street and a group of preschoolers out for a stroll with their teachers.

Libby Doodle Doo did great during the exam and smiled and babbled for various health care personnel. In fact, the women who weighed and measured her we’re so taken by the Doodler that they pulled out their cell phones and took pictures of her after the end of the exam (or maybe they just enchanted with her cute bunny jacket – see below).

The exam consists of 3 stations and each of us rotated among these exams. For Libby Doodle Doo the first one was temperature, height and weight. Her temperature was normal, her height was 71cm and her weight was 17 pounds (strange how they mixed metric and US measurements).

Next we went to the Ears Nose and Throat station. Her hearing was fine and the inside of her ears & throat got a thumbs up.

Finally we went to the physical exam where the physician measured her head circumference (17 inches). Then he listened to her lungs and heart. He also checked her skin top to bottom and examined her skeletal formation. Finally, he checked for lice. AOK there as well.

The entire exam took 15 minutes tops. Libby Doodle Doo was tuckered out and fell to sleep on the way back. She looked very cute in her faux-fur bunny ensemble.

Our next step is reviewing our Consulate paperwork, having our Consulate Appointment and then home -- YEAH!!! I'm ready to go home. China is wonderful and the trip has been great, but I miss my Zo Peep, my home and raw fruit and vegetables.

Libby McNuggets

Here are some tasty morsels of my Libby Doodle Doo taken today.

This morning -- too bad I don't have photoshop to erase the runny nose

My princess asleep:

Ten Little fingers:

And Ten Little Toes:

I Know We're Hen & Chicks, But Chicken Pox -- No Thanks.

It's 1AM Guangzhou time on Sunday. We made it to the lovely White Swan around 5PM yesterday.

The rooms are much, much smaller than the Jiangxi Hotel in Nanchang, but overall the offerings are much nicer -- big, smoke-free lobby (that isn't freezing cold like the unheated one in Nanchang), cleaner rooms, everything new and shiny, plenty of hotel staff who understand English, large, numerous elevators, etc, more places to go within the hotel during times you're walking your cranky baby. I'm glad to be here.

A Quick Story from the Trip from Nanchang

Libby Doodle Doo was great on the bus trip to the airport, great waiting for the plane, great on the 1-1/2 hour plane ride, great riding in a second bus to get to the White Swan. But somewhere in all of that great behavior, she must have peed herself about 60 times – because she leaked straight through her Huggie, through her onesie and through her trousers. I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen a diaper leak. I also can’t remember when I’ve seen such a heavy diaper. It was holding about 10 times its weight in water.

I had the fun task of having to strip her down to her birthday suit on the moving bus heading to the White Swan, clean her up and change her without having her wiggle off the seat. This incident made me remember how an experienced mom can change a diaper anywhere – bleachers, hoods of cars, etc. I felt this little challenge was helping me get my mommy-of-a-baby sea legs back – or should I call them “pee legs”?

But What about the Chicken Pox ?

So the big news at the White Swan is that at least 2 babies in the hotel have Chicken pox. One of the babies is in the other part of my agency’s travel groups (My agency had 28 families receive their referrals in early November. Fifteen of them (my travel group) went to the Jiangxi province; the other thirteen (who left a day after us) has spent their entire trip in Guangzhou). I spoke to the mommy of the second baby (from a completely Different agency) on the phone.

How do I know someone from another agency, you ask? Through the Rumor Queen site, I got to know a few women very well. Someone dubbed us “Guangzhou Grannies” because we were, uh, kind of on the mature side of parenthood. We all got matched with our babies in early November. Our plan was to meet up in Guangzhou for a drink on the famous Red Couch at the White Swan. Unfortunately our travel dates varied dramatically – so that never came to pass. But it did turn out that 3 of us – from 3 different agencies – would all be in Nanchang and Guangzhou at approximately the same general time.

I tried to hook up with these other 2 ladies in Nanchang unsuccessfully. We were all in 3 different hotels, two of us had sick babies, and the Nanchang weather did not invite any of us to take a long, leisurely stroll to each other’s hotels.

When I checked into my room yesterday – even before the luggage arrived – I pulled out my phone numbers and called each woman. The first who was staying at the Victory had just checked out to go home – so close, yet so far away. The second – who is here at the White Swan – answered her phone and told me that her daughter has been diagnosed with Chicken Pox. I feel so badly for her family. She’s under some sort of “house quarantine” and may not be able to go home on Thursday as planned.

Getting the Chicken pox in America is really no big deal. Getting it in a country like China is a very big deal. So clearly this is a problem for my Libby Doodle Doo.

But it also may be a problem for me. A while ago my late mom (who was the mother of 6 kids – so maybe not 100% accurate with her memories) told me that I never had the chicken pox or – at least – that she never remembered me having them.

So – just in case – for my sake and Libby Doodle Doo’s sake (and for my sister for that matter -- who has had Chicken Pox, but also has gotten shingles -- the adult version) I have to try to figure out how to avoid getting Chicken Pox while staying here. Beyond these 2 confirmed cases there must be at least a dozen babies who have already been in close proximity to the infected ones – and may be infected themselves. I guess I’ll be avoiding the White Swan playroom when others are there and avoid other babies that I don’t know -- this is going to be tricky.

Any advice on what I should do would be most welcomed.

Libby Doodle Doo Was A Monster Last Night

Libby Doodle Doo had a big problem with sleep last night. She was clearly very, very tired, but she wouldn’t go to sleep. When I put her down after her bottle and a dose of Tylenol (she was a little warm) she screamed bloody murder on and off for at least 15 minutes.

I checked on her and her diaper was already wet. So I re-changed her – thinking that I had discovered the source of her misery.

But when I put her back down again, she kept on screaming. I tried patting her – no good. I surmised that she must be having teething pain and the Tylenol had not yet kicked in. I took her out again and rubbed her upper gum with some Orajel. She seemed fine again until I put her back down –then the banshee crying started again.

I was determined to wait her out. The first two days I had her, Miss Doodle Doo went to sleep without a peep and slept for 11 hours. Since she's been sick we've run to her whenever she makes any noise and scooped her from her crib. We, therefore, have been up with her throughout the night. Have I rewarded her for and encouraged her to have bad sleep behavior? I may have created this monster.

Back to last night -- I have her crib positioned next to my bed and I can put my hand through the bars to pat her back and stroke her cheek. I did that for about 10 minutes but she kept on screaming.

Finally I gave up and took her out of the crib. So Baby -1; Mommy-0.

My sister thinks she is traumatized by the new surroundings and is unsure what’s going to happen next. I did notice that she freaked out a little when my sister was holding her and I went into the bathroom and out of her sight. I also noticed that when I held her she kept checking out that her Auntie was still there. So my sister may be right. I laid down in my bed with my angel and rubbed her belly. The crying stopped. In about 20 minutes she was asleep. Ten minutes later, I transferred her back to the crib. She's been quiet since then (finally fell asleep at about 8:15 pm)

I'll have to watch her in the next few days to see if this bad sleep behavior continues once she feels settled here in Guangzhou.

(BTW -- I found these gorgeous monster dolls on a website called http://www.katesutton.co.uk/)

Firecrackers!!!

It’s 3 AM on January 19th here in Nanchang – the beginning of our last day here. We fly to Guangzhou this afternoon.

Preparations for Chinese New Year have already begun – posters fill the shop windows, decorations are going up, and stores are selling various items for that event. In honor of that most important holiday, I’ve entitled today’s entry – Firecrackers – short little burst of stories from my trip.

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I’ve already mentioned that there is a large multi-story department store here that is only a few doors down from our hotel. A few days ago – when my camera was not working – I wanted to go to the store to see if I could find a memory card or a new camera.

Michael – one of the dad’s in my group – offered to accompany me because he needed to purchase some things and because he had a hand-held translator (a device that may help me explain what I needed to store clerks).

We purchased what I needed for the camera and then went downstairs to the grocery store. Michael and I both bought some items there, paid for them and decided to go to the floor below to buy some more baby-oriented items. I went down the escalator first. I turned around to see Michael at the top of the escalator with 3 security persons directing him away. I was already half way down the escalator and yelled to him to wait and that I would come right back up.

How scary. When I got to the bottom of the escalator, I looked for the up escalator, but there was none to be found. It took me 5 minutes to locate the up escalator and another 3 to 5 to find my way back to the location where I last saw Michael.

He was no where to be seen.

The entrance to the escalator was surrounded by security people. I asked each one about the American gentleman. They nodded; said something to me; but I obviously didn’t understand them.

Don’t you hate situations like this? Should I go back down to the basement level and search for Michael there or just stay put in hopes that he too will find his way back to this space.

I decided to stay put reasoning that I may never find Michael in the chaos downstairs and that we may just keep missing each other. So I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

I guess I stood there for about 15 minutes. Michael never showed up. Finally, I walked back to the hotel and went to Michael’s room to see if he was there. His wife answered the door.

“Is Michael here,” I asked.

“No.”

“I lost him in the store. Do you want me to go back and search for him?”

“No, he’ll be ok.”

“Let him know that I’m ok. I hope he still isn’t looking for me.”

Michael was ok. Turns out packages aren’t allowed on the lowest level of the store. The security people must not have seen my small package, but they stopped Michael so that he could check his grocery bag. After he checked that package and waited for me for awhile, he went down the escalator in hopes of catching up on that floor.

Nothing scarier than getting separated from companions in a country where you can’t speak the language.

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Libby Doodle Doo is a babbler. She yammers away all day long – except, of course, when I turn on the video camera. I’ve yet to capture her lilting, expressive voice. I’m determined to do it during the Guangzhou portion of our trip.

My sister got up in the middle of the night last night and discovered an amazing thing – Miss Libby Doodle Doo even babbles in her sleep.

How adorable is that?

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We had a group dinner at a local restaurant tonight. Almost all the families attended – which is amazing since the temperatures have dropped close to freezing again and it has been raining all day long.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen so much food on one table. The dishes kept on coming again and again and again. The food was really good – typical Jiangxi cuisine (so a little spicy).

But more important than the food was the company. This is the first socializing experience we’ve had on the trip. It was great getting to know my travel companions a little bit better. What a nice group of people they are.

We suggested the group dinner to De our guide today at a paperwork meeting today. Had we not suggested it, I don’t think it would have happened. My advice to anyone traveling to China – make sure your agency schedules some time when you can socialize with your travel group. If they aren’t planning to do it, you may want to try to convince them to do it for you or work with other travel companions and schedule something on your own.

Talking to your travel group is a great way to answer questions, compare notes and share feelings.

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Back on the home front, Little Zo Peep is doing fine – most of the time (my babysitter estimates 95% of the time). She had a “miss Mommy” moment last Saturday and she been a little naughty since Wednesday. Reports from my babysitter say that her behavior at school and at her before/after school program is just fine – the naughty behavior is only occurring at home.

I am sending emails to Zo Peep daily that contain interesting facts about China. She is printing those notes off and taking them to Kindergarten where the teacher is reading them during Circle Time. Don’t you love teachers like that who can make a kid feel special when she is going through some sad times.

If Zo Peep sends me some of her pictures, I’ll write a little posting about her week and include shots from her vast collection.

I'm sad that she's losing out on special treats because of a few problem behaviors. Here’s hoping she can turn the “angel behavior” back on.

Adventures in Babysitting

Joseph is a dad in our travel group who is here alone while his wife stays home caring for their other 2 children. Joe has adopted from China before – one of the few people in our travel group who has.

Taking this trip alone is a huge challenge. There is no one to give you a break, no one to take photos of events as they happen, no one to talk to in the middle of the night when you can’t sleep. Joe is a real trooper. So put together and doing a great job. The rest of us have been pitching in with photos and stuff and offering to help Joe as much as we can.

The day before yesterday – when Libby Doodle Doo was sick – Joe took me up on my offer to baby-sit his daughter M while he went out to run some shopping errands. He was going to walk to the Nanchang Wal*mart and said that my sister could come along to do some shopping for us – leaving me alone with 2 babies.

Baby M is a lovely child with a very serious, sad little face. Her birth date is very close to Libby Doodle Doo’s but she is much, much bigger than the Doodle. Looking at the two of them, you would think that M is at least 3 months older.

Joe came to my room when Libby Doodle Doo was down for her afternoon nap. He handed M to me, gave me a few instruction and left. I think the last thing he said is, “I know you can handle this, because you’ve adopted before.”

As soon as M arrived in my arms, I could feel her heartbeat begin to accelerate. By the time the hotel door closed and her Baba (daddy) was gone she was already starting to hyperventilate. In less than 30 seconds she let out a blood curdling scream that sent shivers through my body.

Poor thing, she was already bonding to her daddy and she thought that the trauma of Family Day was repeating itself all over again.

Of course her scream woke up Libby Doodle Doo. I put down M to scoop Libby Doodle Doo out of the crib. As soon as M was on the bed, her screams got louder. With Libby Doodle Doo in my left arm and baby M in my right I held both girls simultaneously bouncing up and down trying to calm them.

So I created a little Screaming Stereo for myself. The shrieks felt like they were going to burst my eardrums. Eventually I calmed Libby Doodle Doo down, but it was short lived. One look at M still crying convinced the Doodle that she needed to join back in.

Once upon a time before I adopted Little Zo Peep, I dreamed of receiving a twin referral. “How wonderful,” I thought. “My girls will be so close to each other and I would do all my parenting at one time – wouldn’t that be efficient.”

Am I lucky that the Gods of Adoption never granted me that wish.

I couldn’t seem to get both of them calm at the same time. One would slow down and the other would raise the volume – which only made the first one start up again. I tried diversion tactics – Cheerios – nope. Toys -- nada. Looking in the mirror (actually that made it worse because baby M saw 2 of me instead of 1). Finally, I discovered if we left the room and walked down the hallway both babies would stop crying most of the time.

Carrying one baby up and down and up and down a hotel hallway is tough (I did it a lot with Little Zo Peep 4 years ago). After awhile your lower back starts to hurt like you wouldn’t believe. Your pelvis starts to ache from swaying as you walk. Your neck and shoulders start to cramp up.

Carrying 2 is MURDER. I walked up and down the hallway and back again and knew that -- even though this technique was effective-- I’d never be able to do it for the duration of my babysitting assignment.

I went back to the room and laid both babies on the bed – which undid all the good work I had done in the hallway because they both began to scream again. I put on my Baby Bjorn harness and placed Libby Doodle Doo inside. Then I tried to put M in the stroller. She arched her back, stiffened and refused to go in. So I decided to carry her instead.

I must have looked a sight -- One sick yet mostly quiet baby dangling from a Baby Bjorn with one sock on; another bigger crying baby on my right side with tears running down her face. More than one hotel guest and cleaning person stared at my predicament. And – I don’t know why – something about the way I was walking made my underwear bunch up and give me a giant wedgie. Unfortunately with two hands holding baby M, there was no way for me to readjust myself.

But eventually the technique worked. Baby M calmed down and stopped crying. After a while her body lost its rigidity and she put her head on my shoulder. Finally she was napping. I continued to walk the hallway to assure that she was definitely asleep.

We returned to the room and I laid the sleeping baby M on the bed. I removed my own, nap deprived daughter from the Baby Bjorn and sat her on the bed to eat Cheerios. I patted Baby M as she slept. The next 20 minutes were heaven.

And then Baby M woke up again.

She immediately started crying again – not the banshee fearful cry of before, but a cry never-the-less. I picked her up immediately and started swaying and rocking. She started to calm down. But something amazing happened with Libby Doodle Doo when I did this.

So far I would say that Libby Doodle Doo is bonding with me – but not as intensely as Zo Peep did four years ago. Libby Doodle Doo will happily go to her Auntie A as she will to me – she seems to show no preference. I will say that she isn’t indiscriminate with her affections, though. Although she’ll flirt with other travel mates, she never has raised her arms to be picked up by them – a good sign that she prefers my sister and me over all others. The key is to get her to discriminate between the two of us. Libby Doodle Doo needs to see me as the Mommy and her as the loving Auntie. My sister and I have talked about this and talked about how we need to strike the right balance – we’re not there yet, but we’re working on it.

When Libby Doodle Doo saw me comforting Baby M, swaying her back and forth, patting her back -- she got angry. Really angry. She let out her “I’m not happy with this situation one little bit” cry. She raised her arms to be held by me. I saw this jealousy as a good sign of bonding.

But I knew that my back could not take much more of the “carrying two babies up and down the hallway” routine. I put Baby M back down – which started her crying again. Reinstalled the Baby Bjorn and put Libby Doodle Doo back in.

I tried to put Baby M into the stroller again. This time she let me do it – still crying though. But as soon as the stroller started moving into the hallway, she calmed down again.

So that’s how I spent the remainder of my babysitting gig. Walking the 3rd floor hallways of the Jiangxi hotel with one baby strapped to my chest, another ensconced in a stroller.

Joe and my sister found us in the hallway when they returned from their shopping excursion. I have no idea how long they were gone. My body would have guessed hours and hours and hours – in reality, I think it was probably between 1 hour and 1-1/2 hours.

Joe seemed a little bit surprise to Baby M’s passionate reaction to his departure. Like me he had not yet felt any intense bonding between M and himself.

But Joe and I both learned important lessons that day. I know it’s not true for all adoptive parents, but for the majority of them bonding is seldom a light switch; but more like a dimmer switch. It may take days, weeks – even months – to firmly bond. But every day most new adoptive parents are a little bit closer than they were the day before to establish a strong bond with their child.

On Tuesday both Joe and I saw how far we’ve already come in just a few short days.

Day Four Photos

Hello from rainy, cold Nanchang. Our outing was cancelled due to bad weather and all of my travel group is going a little stir crazy. There is no where for us to gather. The lobby is large enough, but unheated and with a lot of smoking business men. I tried to get the Assistant Hotel Manager to give us an unused conference room to create a makeshift playroom, but his bosses would not allow him to do that. Libby Doodle Doo, my sister and I are going to bundle up and go to the nearby department store. Here are some photos from this morning so far:

First, Libby Doodle Doo's perfect little features during a diaper change:




Next, she loves her bath time:



Third, the ever-present thumb makes an appearance:



Fourth, I've been determined to capture her smile on film. Attempt #1:



and finally, attempt #2:

Sick Chick -- China Version

WARNING – GROSS DESCRIPTIONS OF MUCOUS AHEAD.

It is a truth, universally acknowledged that a Chinese Baby in possession of a new Mama must be in want of a head cold. (With apologies to Ms. Austen).

Libby Doodle Doo is sick --Congested. Sneezing (here she is from last night mid-sneeze),

Intermittent Fever, Disgusting mucous exploding from her nose at regular intervals.

It’s amazing how many disgusting secretions mommies have to deal with – gross substances coming out of ever orifice a child has. I was just wrapping my head around facing 2+ years of changing poopy diapers again and now I’m already being bombarded with an Old Faithful geyser of snot coming from Libby Doodle Doo’s cute little button nose.

I knew something was wrong last night. Libby Doodle Doo has been such a good sleeper for our first 2 nights with her. We would put her down and she would fall asleep quickly and sleep straight through for 11 + hours without a peep. Last night was her first night as my official daughter – so of course, she decides to have a fussy bedtime. She cried off and on for 45 minutes when we put her down a little before 8.

Finally I picked her up and my sister made another bottle (she inhaled the one we gave her right before bedtime, so maybe she was still hungry). She wouldn’t have anything to do with this second offering. Then my sister correctly diagnosed that she may be congested and was having trouble breathing once she put her thumb in her mouth to suck. So we gave Libby Doodle Doo some saline drops and laid her back down again. Once again more crying and fussing. She continued to wake up throughout the night – sometimes 15 minutes; sometimes for an hour or more.

At morning time, her face, forearms and pajamas were covered in dried crusty mucous – so gross. She also was running a touch of fever, so I gave her some Tylenol.

We didn’t have any official paperwork to do today and the guide planned to take everyone on some sightseeing. I stayed behind to care for Miss Doodle Doo.

In a previous post I’ve written about how people can be divided into 2 camps – those that are stoic, brave angels when they are sick and those that are whiny big babies. Little Zo Peep belongs to the former camp – courageous, quiet, introspective. I am a big baby when I’m sick. Our newest family member acts a lot like I do.

Libby Doodle Doo moaned, whined, and was as cranky as can be all day.

She particularly HATES having her nose wiped with Kleenex. In fact, when the cleaning crew came in this morning and replaced the Kleenex box she pitched a fit at the sign of Kleenex reinforcements. She DESPISES the sight of them. When I approach her with a Kleenex to wipe off the latest slimy offering that has emerged from her nose, she employs several diversion tactics – she buries her head where I can’t reach it, she turn her head so far that it looks like it may start spinning, she wipes the offensive stuff on me (her favorite maneuver).

She hasn’t napped very much today either. I’d be surprised if she got more than 20 minutes in total. We put her to bed early tonight (a little before 7:30). So far (it’s midnight now) she has stayed asleep. She has made yelping cries intermittently, but falls right back to sleep after an outburst. I have my fingers crossed that she sleeps at least until 6AM.

Here’s hoping to a better day tomorrow.

Eureka! I fixed my camera

I've been having camera problems this entire trip. My point and shoot digital camera which I've had for two years was distorting the image whenever the flash discharged -- and given how dark and overcast it is in Nanchang the flash was discharging for every shot.

My pictures were coming out strangely. If you looked closely everything -- hairs, skin, etc --looked as if it was either wet or covered in glitter. Sort of like Tinkerbell had sprinkled us all with Pixie dust.

I've been trying lots of things to correct the problem -- but nothing worked. Here I am experiencing one of the most amazing moments of my life and I can't get a decent picture of anything.

Yesterday I posted the problem on the RQ (Rumor Queen) forum board. I know that RQ is a controversial site in the adoption world -- some people love it; some people hate it. I don't want to get into that debate here. But no matter what you think of the site, I have to tell you that the forum section of the site is filled with some of the most supportive and helpful adoptive parents I ever met.

In a couple hours I got information on camera stores and electronic stores all over Nanchang. People asked me questions about different things I should check. One poster -- Global Gal -- asked me to double check all of my settings and asked if I had packed my Owner's Guide.

Of course I hadn't -- it was an old camera and I thought I knew how to use it. But her suggestion encouraged me to find the manual on line. I read the entire thing -- cover to cover. I think it's the first time I read past the section called "Getting Started." What a concept. Read a owner's guide when you get a new camera. Revolutionary. A Big THANK YOU to everyone at RQ who gave me suggestions.

So as I went through the manual, I found out that a lot of my settings were out of the recommended ranges. I changed them all one by one and then took a couple test shots of Miss Libby Doodle Doo eating her beloved snack -- Cheerios. I think you'll agree that the problem is solved:

Ginger Snaps

What a spicy little girl I have -- hence the name for this post. She is a very happy baby, but let's you know immediately when she is displeased.

Take this morning for example. We had a very busy day this morning. On a bus, off a bus, on a bus, off a bus and so on and so on. Miss Libby Doodle Doo got pretty fed up with the multiple layers of clothing, the slippery sidewalks. the photos that needed to be taken , and the lack of 100% attention from her mom. The cause of her frustrations was worthwhile, though. Because by lunchtime Libby Doodle Doo was officially my daughter and Little Zo Peep's sister. I'll write more about this momentous day later tonight.

For now as Libby Doodle Doo is down for another winter nap, I thought I'd post some snapshots. Apologies in advance for these photos. My camera is acting funny -- producing images that are very pixilated. I'm going to go to the store later, see if I can buy a new memory card and may end up just buying a new camera.

Here's Libby in some hats. First, An Oo La La Beret



Next, a doggie hat that she clearly hates (wore it today and screamed whenever we put it on her )


Finally, here's a shot of my cupcake this morning before we went on our many, many appointments and I became her mommy and she became my daughter.

Dim Sum -- Tasty Tidbits from China

It’s 2 AM in Nanchang and I woke up to get some Advil. Wanted to share some quick stories from the trip so far:

On the frigid bus trip from the airport to hotel, De handed out a sheet of paper that listed the name of everyone in the group, their hotel room AND (drum roll, please) their BIRTH DATE. YIKES!!!!! I have trouble admitting my age to people I know, let alone a group of people I’m just meeting.

Well – no surprise -- yours truly wins the award for Geezer Mom of the group. No one even comes close. What that saying about , “With Age Comes Great Wisdom.”

I hope.

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Yesterday during a meeting to complete a stack of paperwork, my sister took Libby Doodle Doo to the back of the room and played with her with some toys we had brought with us. Soon several other parents joined her in an impromptu “play group.”

When the meeting was over, my sister relayed an amazing story.

“You won’t believe what she did.”

“What?”

“She would offer one of her toys to another baby. I thought, ‘Oh my, what great sharing skills she has.’ Then, when the baby comes close to grabbing the toy, Libby Doodle Doo pulled it back and started to giggle like crazy. If the other baby was able to get the toy, Libby would give the baby a little slap on the back of the hand and start giggling even more.”

Oh my!

We tried it with Libby. I offered her a toy and pulled it back just as she was about to grab it. She just crack up. I let her grab the toy and pretended like I was going to hit her hand. She howled with laughter.

Oh my!!!

What an interesting “sharing” game I need to help my daughter unlearn.

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We got busted by the Chinese Clothing Police – TWICE.

As I said before – Nanchang is COLD. Wicked, Stinging COLD.

Yesterday afternoon we took Libby Doodle Doo out and walked to a grocery store (3 doors from the hotel) to get some water, baby food, cereal and teething biscuits.

She was wearing knit pants with socks, a long sleeve onesie, a sweater, a snowsuit with hood (that we had borrowed from another family), baby mittens, a tie-on knit hat under the hood .

She cried as all of these layers went on – especially the mittens that blocked access to her favorite sucking thumb. We put the crying Libby Doodle Doo in a stroller (provided by the hotel) and tucked a fleece blanket around her. A small slit for her eyes was the only Libby Doodle Doo that anyone could see.

At first, people passed us, looked at the bundle in the stroller and nodded approvingly.

As we continued to the store, Libby Doodle Doo started to kick her legs up and down – constantly kicking off the firmly-tucked blanket. I had to stop every few feet and re-tuck her.

Her kicking legs blew our cover.

Once we got to the multistory store and entered (the main floor was not heated by the way – very interesting), a sales clerk approached us, crouched down to look at Libby Doodle Doo and as she looked at my daughter, she subtly squeezed her calf. She said something to her coworkers.

About 5 minutes later, a shopper did the same thing and I realized what was going on. They were checking out how many layers I had on her legs. If Libby Doodle Doo was dressed properly in enough layers she would not have been able to move her legs at all. In other words (to paraphrase Johnny Cocorhan):

“If the Leg can Kick, The Layers Aren’t Thick.”

After we bought the groceries, we took Libby Doodle Doo out of the stroller, used that for our grocery bags, and I carried her – covered in a blanket – back to the hotel. She was thankfully immobile on the way back.

We have to take the babies out to our appointments tomorrow. I’m already plotting my strategy to pass the watchful standards of the Chinese Clothing Police.

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My insomnia caught up with me big time at about 4PM yesterday. I suddenly got horribly tired. I couldn’t keep my eyes open. Finally at about 6PM I had to lay down. My wonderful sister gave Libby Doodle Doo her evening bottle and dinner, changed her for bed and tucked her in for the night. I occasionally woke up to the activities between the two, but was mostly out of it.

A big thank you to my sister for pitching in and taking over all of my jobs last night. We both missed dinner because of my zombie-like state. I owe that woman BIG TIME.

I'm going to go back to sleep now so that I'm fully-charged to go tomorrow.

Nap Time; Snap Time

It's noontime on Monday in China. Libby Doodle Doo is taking a nap and I thought I'd make a quick post with some snapshots of her.

First a shot of her two lower chompers of which she shows great pride:



Second, her long, long eyelashes -- wouldn't any woman just kill for lashes like that:



Third, everything goes into Libby Doodle's mouth because she is teething:



And finally, I just love that thumb in her mouth. This shot was just taken 5 minutes ago:

She's a Thumb-sucker!!!

What a day!

It's a little before 10 PM here. My sister is sound asleep. Libby Doodle Doo is sleeping in her crib sucking her thumb. I'm exhilarated and dumbfounded and amazed at the monumental events of the last 18 hours.

Here's a recap.

We left Hong Kong at 11:15 this morning. Several of us almost missed our plane because Ben our guide kept us at the hotel until after 10AM giving us helpful hints and -- by the time we hit check in, passport control and security -- the lines were wicked long.

My sister and I were hoofing it for the last 10 minutes and got at the gate as FINAL BOARDING was flashing on the monitor. About 5 of the 15 families boarded after we did, many of them had to run through the airport to make it in time.


The flight to Nanchang was uneventful. We passed through immigration, gathered our bags and went through customs. And then we had to squeeze through a gauntlet of hundreds of screaming teenagers who were crowded at the reception area in hopes of catching sight of some famous celebrity who was arriving at the same time we were. Now I know what the REAL Angelina Jolie must feel like. Gosh it was awful, really claustrophobic.

One by one each family passed through the tunnel of teenagers and met up with our guide De. After my sister and some others went on the adventure of their lives -- using their first squat potty -- we went outside to the bus. It is COLD in Nanchang. I'm talking WISCONSIN Cold. I expected the temperature to be about 50 degrees. I swear it was below freezing. The sidewalks to the bus were wet and a little icy in places. A bone-chilling sleet/rain was misting from the sky.
And then we got on the bus for our 45 minute ride. An UNHEATED bus. I kid you not -- I could see my breath. During the ride De and his translator told us what to expect this afternoon. Check into hotels, unpack, meeting in his room at 3PM, meet the babies at 4:30 PM at the hotel reception area. So the babies were coming to us at the hotel.

We got to the Jiangxi hotel at around 2 to 2:30. Went to De's meeting, handed over our various gifts, gave our money for the orphanage donation and waited. I had to get some money changed before 4:30, so I went down to the lobby at 4:15 and as the elevator doors opened -- whoosh -- there were about a half dozen nannies carrying babies -- OUR BABIES.

I had my video camera in my hand, but didn't have it turned on. By the time I turned it on, the elevator doors had already shut. Had I just seen my Libby Doodle Doo? I didn't know, but my heart was racing (turns out I had).

I rushed back to my room after exchanging the money, gathered my stuff and headed for the 5th floor reception room -- video camera turned on and ready to go.

I entered the room to a cacophony of sounds and sights. Nannies with babies stood around. De had already matched 2 families with their babies. He called for family #3 -- they weren't there. He called for family #4 -- they weren't there. He called for family #5 -- THAT WAS ME.

I passed the video camera to my sister and dropped all the other stuff I was carrying in my hand. It wasn't the slow, formal hand off I had expected. My eyes darted around the room to see which baby was being brought to me. Then I saw this perfect angel, bundled in a blue snowsuit, coming to the front of the room toward me. Suddenly the nanny plopped the baby into my arms.

And Libby Doodle Doo was mine.

She's lovely -- with a sweet angelic face, a round head (the back of Zo Peep's head was as flat as a board), sweet little Dumbo-like ears, and 2 teeth (with more ready to make an appearance). She stared at me for the first few minutes as other families were being created around us. And then she started to scream. My this child has the lungs on her. I was pulled back to my first meeting with Little Zo Peep. She screamed until her face turned purple. She never stopped screaming for days. Was I in for another crying marathon?

The short answer is NO. Libby Doodle Doo has cried off and on since that first encounter -- but not non-stop. Once all the families had received their babies and we got our instructions from De, we went back to the room.

I had my sister undress Libby Doodle Doo as I filmed. Here's what my little Pillsbury DoughGirl was wearing -- 1 pair of fleece snowpaints and a matching fleece jacket, socks and fleece lined moccasins, a white cotton sweater with matching pants, a long sleeved t-shirt and a pair of split pants. She probably lost 5 pounds once all of those layers were off.

We then checked her over head to toe. She has really chapped cheeks, a little bit of heat rash in her armpits and the worst case of diaper rash I've ever seen. My poor baby is SOOO Red and has some very scary looking lesions. I cleaned her up and put on some Flanders Buttocks Cream -- a brand I discovered with Zo Peep that worked wonders with her. I hope I have equal success with Libby.

After we put some pajamas on her, we tried our first bottle. She seemed so excited -- until it went in her mouth. She clearly was not impressed with what we presented her and started crying. We then offered her applesauce and Cheerios -- she accepted both with enthusiasm.

Libby Doodle Doo was Very hungry. She wolfed down both in no time flat. Then I made some rice cereal while my sister went to the store with other parents for food and bottled water. When my sister returned she told me that the other parents were not having trouble with bottles. She rejiggered the ratios we were using and we tried again. Again she rejected it. Finally, we cut an "X" in the nipple to increase the flow. Eureka! She took the bottle.

Once Libby Doodle Doo was satiated, the 3 of us joined a few other families in the downstairs restaurant. I didn't have much of an appetite -- but Miss Libby Doodle Doo decided she wanted to eat some congee.

After dinner, we came back, changed her diaper and put her to bed (30 minutes later than her usual sleep time). She fussed off and on for about an hour. After a while my sister turned off all the lights and eventually my little one fell asleep.

I promise to post more pictures tomorrow. Blogger is giving me some problems (as I suspected) here in China.

Hong Kong - Saturday; BABIES SUNDAY!!!!

Hello everyone. It’s 4:24 Sunday morning in Hong Kong. We arrived at the hotel safely (yet exhausted) last night around 9pm. After a refreshing shower, a little unpacking and some mending (snagged my sweater on the plane – don’t know how), we settle in for a nice winter nap (well 5 hours -- that seems luxurious compared to my regular sleeping schedule lately).

The plane ride was long, very long. The food was typical airline fare. I probably didn’t drink enough water. And I slept more than I should have (my goal was to adopt Chinese time as soon as I boarded, but the in flight video selection was iffy at best and I couldn’t find enough things to distract me to keep me awake).

I never had that panic attack that I had predicted I’d have flying over the Pacific – because our flight plan didn’t take us over the Pacific (so thank you Continental airlines for eliminating this opportunity for me). We flew over the North Pole instead. Zo Peep will be so excited to hear that mommy flew over Santa’s workshop.

My sister and I were in the bulkhead seats in coach. The great news is that I had a lot of comfortable leg room to stretch my legs and great ease in getting up and down to walk around or use the restroom without disturbing my sister who sat in the aisle seat. This will be especially important on the trip back when I suspect I’ll be up and down with Libby Doodle Doo regularly.

The only downside is that the armrests don’t flip up in the bulkhead, so we didn’t get that extra hip room I had been hoping for. I had purchased the middle seat on our flight here and back to give my – how shall we say, um – ample bottom a little “breathing” room. Hey, now I have added motivation to drop some weight while here in China.

A gentleman named Ben met us at the airport and led us to the hotel that is literally attached to the hotel. Ben told us about where to buy water in the airport, where we can get internet access, how to use our breakfast vouchers, etc.

Ben’s most important news is that we are going to get the babies TODAY—not Monday as was originally planned.

So today’s plan is to repack and grab breakfast early. We fly out at 11am and arrive in Nanchang by 1:30PM. Sometime, somewhere this afternoon I’ll meet Libby Doodle Doo.

I’m restless – hence the reason I’m up at 4AM.

Addendum : I called Zo Peep last night (Saturday morning her time). My sister said that she is being an absolute angel – no tears, no trouble. Zo Peep is LUVIN’ her new digital camera and is taking oodles and oodles of pictures that she wants to send to me.

When Zo Peep got on the phone, the first thing she said was, Do you have Libby yet?” I told her not yet but soon. She and Aunt M were getting ready to go to her Chinese Mandarin class. I told her that I’d call her after Sunday church and she could talk to Libby Doodle Doo.

“She can’t talk, Mommy.”

“Well you can talk to her and maybe she’ll say, ‘Goo goo, ga ga’ to you.”

She thought that was hilarious.

I can’t wait to hear this interaction between the two of them later today.

The Gathering

The skies are a milky grey in Newark as the rain pounds onto the tarmac. The 14 families that are traveling with me are slowly assembling at Gate 98 waiting for our 3PM flight. We have teenagers and toddlers, soon-to-be grandparents, siblings and friends. And—of course -- many soon-to-be parents who are nervous and excited and in disbelief that this is actually finally happening.

My goodbye with Little Zo Peep this morning was sad, but not a sob fest. I decided to allow her to start the treasure hunt before I left so the prospect of a present before 6am was enough incentive to help her be a brave little soldier. Her first treasure was a Fisher Price digital camera. Her job is to take pictures of her 14 days with her Auntie.

Our flight to Newark was a little bumpy, but uneventful.

I count myself among those parents who are trying to grasp the REALNESS of what is happening now. I told my sister that I expect to go into panic mode somewhere over the Pacific when I say to myself, “Are you crazy. You can barely keep your head above water raising Little Zo Peep. What makes you think you can ever raise two children on your own?”

She told me that she is very good at talking people off of the ledge and that she is confident that she can calm me down.

I know that I’ll be alright. It’s all part of the pre-adoption jitters.